Burning bridges...

I realized today that no matter how good of friends you are with someone, no matter how much you care about them, or no matter what that friendship means to you it might not always be there. I also realized how two-faced someone might be.

Some of you might know that in the past year I lost my best friend. I used to think he was a brother from another mother…and father. I loved him as if he was my brother all along, even though we had only known each other since junior year of high school. We had been through some ups and downs, but it always seemed to work it out and together we were again like best friends should. I went to him for everything, even if I had other people to go to, I still always went to him to talk to, to look for advice, or to vent to.

After a while he started noticing that I was unhappy, and that my personality had changed. I was having issues in my marriage and he pointed it out to me. He said I could stay with him if I needed to, or while he was out of town I could use his place to crash just to get out of the house. He told me that he didn’t liked seeing me unhappy and that I needed to do something about it. The problem was I had tried already, and I started to realize something. Love isn’t always what it seems. I wasn’t in love with the person I once was. I got married too young, yes, lesson learned, and it was a tough lesson at that. I walked away from my marriage a wiser person, knowing that I did the right thing because if you aren’t in love, why waste yours or the other persons time being married, life is short. It sucks knowing you hurt someone, but the truth is we both learned from it.

One day I was at his house and he had 2 cars in his driveway that he was fixing up to sell. I mentioned to him that my stepbrother needed a cheap car and asked how much he was selling the cars for. The cheapest car he said he would sell to my stepbrother for $1700. I just happened to be on my way to my dad’s house, so I told him I would let them know. I let my stepmom know about the car and gave them his number so they could call him and coordinate things if they were interested.  I know it’s bad to involve friends and family in buying and selling things to each other, but I trusted him.

Time goes by and about a month and a half later I got a call from my dad asking if I talked to my friend. I said yes, cause I was over there almost every day to hang out unless he was working on a car. My dad told me that they could not get in contact with him and they needed to so they could get the car they bought from him registered in their name. They didn’t tell me they had been dealing with this for the last month because they knew he was my best friend and didn’t want to put me in the middle of it, but that didn’t work so they had to. So I called my friend and told him that I couldn’t believe he would do that to my family, and that he just needed to fix it. He was my best friend and all I wanted was him to fix it so they didn’t have to pay more money to get the “cheap” car on the road.  Of course my friend was appalled by me telling him this and was offended that I didn’t fully believe him. That my stepbrother knew the whole time the issue with the title and why should he have to do anything else because he sold the car as-is. I understood he sold the car as-is, but I don’t think he thought about that when he sold it to his best friends family. It didn’t matter, he needed to fix the issue so I was not put in the middle anymore, and all I did was try and help everyone out. At this point my best friend would no longer talk to me. After I was separated from my wife I stopped by my friends house to talk to him, if he wasn’t going to answer my phone calls or texts he would have to talk to me in person. He came outside explained his side of the story, told me why he was upset, and let me explain what I had to deal with. About this time I found out that he had my wife who I was currently separated from getting a divorce over for dinner. I asked him if this was true and he said it was, but you know my business was mine and hers was hers and he wasn’t going to tell either of us about the other. About this time he said he had to go take a shower and went back inside.  I haven’t spoken with him since.

My friend and his fiancé got married this weekend. I was supposed to be the best man, but because of the car issue, and him and his fiancé hanging out with my ex-wife I was not invited. A few days ago I sent him a text message wishing him and his fiancé the best and apologizing for what had happened to our friendship. I know its not all my fault, but I wanted to change things so we could be friends again. I did not receive a text back, no response, or anything of the sort. No matter what happened I didn’t want to throw away a friendship. I have thought about everything that has happened and I realized its stupid to lose a friend over that. I realized that friends are important to have in your life and not to let the little things ruin that. I forgave him and thought he would do the same, but I guess I was wrong.